My Weight Loss Journey

I've been contemplating this post for a few weeks now. A post about my weight loss, my weight gain, and a personal challenge to myself. It terrifies me to talk about my weight loss but I'm hopeful that my story will inspire yours, so here goes nothing.

For those of you that have known me for many years, you know that I have had quite the weight loss story and journey. For those of you that haven't known me that long or are a new reader, here's a quick look into where I've been, how far I've come and how far I have left to go.

For much, if not all of my childhood I was overweight. This caused for a lot of bullying and torment from classmates and also created a severe lack of confidence. Most days I would get off of the school bus in tears or dread having to get back on the bus. I loved school but as we all know, kids are cruel and unfortunately I was an easy target. Thankfully I had the greatest parents and extended family that would always tell me that I was better than the tormenting and that I could be and do anything I wanted to. I truly don't know how I would have made it through those tough days without their support.

During my sophomore year in high school I decided to join Weight Watchers. I was desperate for a change and needed the support and guidance so weight watchers was a great place to go. The silly thing is I was nervous to tell any of my friends because for whatever reason it felt embarrassing. Why would we ever be embarrassed about trying to get healthy? Thanks to weight watchers I lost 104lbs and kept it off for almost two years. This weight loss helped me feel comfortable in my own skin and have confidence in myself.

Weight watchers was great at teaching portion control and creating a community to lean on and be accountable to, but unfortunately they didn't teach healthy habits. Without having these healthy habits I easily put weight back on. In early 2011 after ending a long term tumultuous relationship, I found myself 40lbs heavier, but most importantly unhappy with myself. After wallowing in a bit of self pity-- because that was the easy thing to do, I came to a realization that has changed my outlook on weight loss.

For me, weight loss and keeping weight off would not be successful using the newest diet, diet pills, wrap or quick fix. I needed to make a lifestyle change, something that I could keep up and continue even after I dropped the weight. While I wish I could be one of those girls who could eat a quart of ice cream and not gain an ounce, that just wasn't in the cards for me.

After finally realizing that my diet and exercise were something I would have to watch for the rest of my life, I joined a local CrossFit gym and started eating "clean" 80-90% of the time. By clean I mean low fat, low sugar, lean proteins and lots of leafy greens and fruits. When you face the point where you know this is something you'll do for the rest of your life it is easier to accept and stick to. There just isn't another option for me if I want to live a healthy, active and confident life.

I later met my now husband and continued to lose weight by exercising and eating healthy. I lost the 40lbs I had previously gained and about 15 more. In fact, I was finally at my goal weight!! I cannot even begin to describe the feeling I had the morning I stepped on that scale and saw my goal weight, a number I never thought I would hit. The feeling was amazing but what was strange was when I looked in the mirror, I DIDN'T see the change. If you've ever struggled with your weight, but then lost a large amount, you'll know what I mean. It is like you know you're thinner and more in shape but for some reason psychologically you still see the same overweight person in the mirror... More on that to come in a future post.

Anyways, I kept that weight off for nearly two years while my husband and I went on adventures, planned a wedding and got married. As many of you married ladies and gentleman might know, there's a bit of "wedding weight" or "newlywed comfort" that happens in your first year. Well mix a pinch of "wedding weight" with a scoop of work travel to places like NYC and The Land of All Things Queso (Austin, TX.), finishing a bachelors degree, and moving twice, you'll get 25 whole pounds. Yep, 25lbs that sneak up on you and stare at you in the mirror every morning or when you put on those jeans that are WAY too tight to even THINK about wearing in public. Can you say "hello muffin top"?!

Can I get an amen?!

 So that is where I am currently, and why I want to share my journey with you all. I have 25lbs to lose in order to get back to my happy place, to feel 100% confident in my skin and in control. I hope my journey can serve as inspiration for those of you thinking about losing weight or for those who are having to lose some they've previously lost before. The good news is I know from experience that it is 100% possible, but you have to want it and you have to be willing to work for it. I would be lying if I told you there wouldn't be bad days when all you want to do is order the biggest ice cream sundae on the menu, when you really don't want to go to the gym, or when you just want to give up completely, but WE CAN DO THIS!

I can't promise daily updates or weekly recaps, but I am promising to keep you updated, to share my tips and tricks, my success and failures, and my before and afters. In fact here's a few for you to start.

This photo was taken not long after hitting my goal weight. Can't wait to look and feel that way again!

This was the eye opener for me. Time to get to work!

I'm hopeful that sharing this very personal journey will help me stay accountable and alert to my daily activities and indulgences. I'll be tracking my food on MyFitnessPal and my activity using FitBit. Here's to the long journey ahead, it won't be easy but it will be SO worth it!